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body_diff: "[{\"diffs\":[[1,\"<html>\\\r\\\n<head>\\\r\\\n  <title>意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择</title>\\\r\\\n  <basefont face=\\\"微软雅黑\\\" size=\\\"2\\\" />\\\r\\\n  <meta http-equiv=\\\"Content-Type\\\" content=\\\"text/html;charset=utf-8\\\" />\\\r\\\n  <meta name=\\\"exporter-version\\\" content=\\\"YXBJ Windows/608924 (zh-CN, DDL); Windows/10.0.0 (Win64); EDAMVersion=V2;\\\"/>\\\r\\\n  <style>\\\r\\\n\\tbody, td {\\\r\\\n\\t  font-family: 微软雅黑;\\\r\\\n\\t  font-size: 12pt;\\\r\\\n\\t}\\\r\\\n  </style>\\\r\\\n</head>\\\r\\\n<body>\\\r\\\n<a name=\\\"23264\\\"></a>\\\r\\\n<h1>意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择</h1>\\\r\\\n\\\r\\\n<div>\\\n<span><div><br/></div><div style=\\\"min-height: 5549px; font-size: 16px; min-width: 100%;\\\"><div style=\\\"background-color: transparent; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><div style=\\\"background-color: transparent; vertical-align: baseline; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px auto; padding: 0px 2em; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; width: 36em; z-index: 200; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 25px 0px -25px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px 0px 9em; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><h1 style=\\\"text-align: left; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline; font-size: 35px; padding: 0px; margin: 0px;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 35px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 35px; font-weight: normal;\\\">意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择</span></h1><div style=\\\"padding: 1.5em 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative; height: 1em; text-align: center; margin: 0px;\\\"><div style=\\\"padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;background:-webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);position:absolute;left:-4em;top:50%;z-index:10;width:100%;padding-left:4em;padding-right:4em;height:0.1em;opacity:0.5;margin:0px;margin-bottom:0px;\\\"></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">原创</span> <span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">HBR-China</span> <span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(6, 85, 136); text-decoration: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">哈佛商业评论</span> <span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-style: italic; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">2020-12-16</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><img src=\\\"意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择_files/640\\\" type=\\\"image/gif\\\" data-filename=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"115\\\" style=\\\"color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; text-align: center; font-variant: inherit; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; display: block;\\\" width=\\\"576\\\"/></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">小佛爷说</span></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">许多人不愿触及可能的分歧，不愿进行令人不快的对话，于是试图彻底避免这类话题。不过另一种方法可能更有效：使用接受性的措辞。意见不一的各方应当表达出交流的意愿，用语言表明自己真心对其他人的观点感兴趣。研究发现，这种行为既能通过学习获得，也能通过练习加以巩固。</span></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1em 0px 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; text-align: center;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\"><br/></span></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">运转良好的组织就像运转良好的社会一样，需要员工和领导者开展建设性的交流，即使面对不同的观点和意见——事实上，这种时候尤其需要交流。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">现如今这一点说起来比做起来简单。</span><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">在社交媒体和现实生活中，我们常常跟似乎与自己核心信仰及价值观冲突的人打交道。</span><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">口罩能否减缓新冠病毒蔓延，疫情之下该不该让人居家办公，抑或在总统大选中支持谁，这一类的意见分歧往往会转为激烈的争论。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">许多人不愿触及可能的分歧，不愿进行令人不快的对话，于是试图彻底避免这类话题。不过另一种方法可能更有效：</span><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">使用接受性的措辞。</span><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">意见不一的各方应当表达出交流的意愿，用语言表明自己真心对其他人的观点感兴趣。我与其他研究者在研究中发现，这种行为既能通过学习获得，也能通过练习巩固。</span></div><p style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;margin-bottom:1.5em;\\\"></p><div style=\\\"margin: 1em 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; text-align: center;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\"><img src=\\\"意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择_files/640 [1]\\\" type=\\\"image/png\\\" data-filename=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"324\\\" style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;display:block;max-width:100%;\\\" width=\\\"576\\\"/></span></div><p style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;margin-bottom:1.5em;\\\"></p><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><strong style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">根本原因</span></strong></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">许多人自然而然地想要回避可能引起争议的对话，是因为人们通常更愿意与能够认可自己观念的人交流，而不是意见不一的人。实际上，我们错误地预测了自己在这种对话中的感受。举例来说，最近哈佛大学肯尼迪政府学院查尔斯·多里松（Charles Dorison）、朱莉娅·明松（Julia Minson）和托德·罗杰斯（Todd Rogers）的一项研究表明，政治党派高估了与持相反观点的人进行交谈的不快程度。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">此外，我们在跟与自己观念冲突的人交流时，往往会试图说服他们放弃自己的想法、接受我们的想法。我们预设自己是对的、对方是错的，于是努力捍卫自己的观点，想要在争论中“获胜”。问题在于，对方可能也是这样想的。这种方式会产生负面影响，令我们面对更加棘手的冲突。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">更好的方法</span></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; background-color: rgb(255, 250, 165); transition: background-color 0.4s ease 0s; color: black; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-style: unset;-evernote-highlight:true;\\\" title=\\\"點擊以移除螢光筆畫記\\\">我们的研究表明，</span><strong style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; background-color: rgb(255, 250, 165); transition: background-color 0.4s ease 0s; color: black; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; font-style: unset;-evernote-highlight:true;\\\" title=\\\"點擊以移除螢光筆畫記\\\">如果我们表现得乐于倾听和接受对方提出的相反意见，就会让对方觉得我们的意见更加令人信服。</span></strong><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">另外，接受性的语言具有感染力，会让持有不同意见的对方也更加愿意接受不同意见。接受性的语言还会让人更喜欢对方，更希望与对方合作。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">我们总结接受性语言的方式是，先请几千个人给自己不同意的政治主张（如“美国所有的州都应当废除死刑”等）写回复，随后请另外几千人评价每条回复展现出的关注程度、接受性以及开放程度。关于每一位回复者是否表现出接受性，评价者的意见基本一致。之后我们开发出一套算法，识别哪些词汇和短语能增加或减少一段文字表现出的接受性。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">根据研究结果，我们总结出了在激烈的争执和政治对话中利用接受性语言的四项策略。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">一、认可对方的观点</span></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; background-color: rgb(255, 250, 165); transition: background-color 0.4s ease 0s; color: black; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-style: unset;-evernote-highlight:true;\\\" title=\\\"點擊以移除螢光筆畫記\\\">用“我理解……”或“我觉得你说的意思是……”这样的语言认可与自己意见不一的人的观点，表示你在关注对话。也可以感谢对方分享观点。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">斯坦福大学研究科学家赵萱（音译）及其他科研人员一项未发表的研究发现，</span><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; background-color: rgb(255, 250, 165); transition: background-color 0.4s ease 0s; color: black; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-style: unset;-evernote-highlight:true;\\\" title=\\\"點擊以移除螢光筆畫記\\\">说“谢谢你，因为……”表示我们虽然不同意对方，但依然认可对方的观点有价值。“谢谢你”很重要。越来越多的研究表明，这种细微之处可以带来更好的交流效果和更加亲社会的行为。表示感谢会让对方觉得自己受到重视和信任，从而更加愿意交流。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">感谢后面的“因为”也很重要：这样说会让人关注“为什么”，认真倾听对方的意见并做出恰当的回应，还可以降低他人觉得你的批评是人身攻击的可能性。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">认可并不等于赞同对方的观点，但可以表明我们在倾听并理解不同的观点。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">二、以较为不确定的方式表达自己的主张</span></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">社会以各种微妙和不那么微妙的方式向我们传达了一个信息：我们应当强势且自信，应当抓住自己想要的东西，以直接、强硬的方式表达自己的意见。相反，表现出试探、犹豫和不确定则会让我们被评价为软弱、优柔寡断。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">果断和外向获得赞赏，谦逊则很可耻。但这是不对的。表达自己主张时带有不确定，是有接受性的表现。比如，跟别人说“允许员工自行选择是否采用弹性工作时间，可能有助于提升敬业度”，会比“允许员工自行选择是否采用弹性工作时间无疑一定能提升敬业度”显得不那么武断，因此被对方接受的可能性更高。</span></div><p style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;margin-bottom:1.5em;\\\"></p><div style=\\\"margin: 1em 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; text-align: center;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\"><img src=\\\"意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择_files/640 [2]\\\" type=\\\"image/png\\\" data-filename=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"324\\\" style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;display:block;max-width:100%;\\\" width=\\\"576\\\"/></span></div><p style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;margin-bottom:1.5em;\\\"></p><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">三、用积极的语言表述你的观点</span></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">争执中很容易使用否定性的语言，比如说对方的观点“不值得重视”。注意使用肯定的语言，比方说，比起“营销活动的人数不应该再增加了”这样的表述，“我们来考虑一下减少营销活动的人数可能有哪些好处”可能更好。前者听起来十分肯定，语气消极，显得发言者不愿进行进一步的讨论，不接受其他观点。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><strong style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; background-color: rgb(255, 250, 165); transition: background-color 0.4s ease 0s; color: black; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; font-style: unset;-evernote-highlight:true;\\\" title=\\\"點擊以移除螢光筆畫記\\\">四、指出双方有共识的地方</span></strong></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; background-color: rgb(255, 250, 165); transition: background-color 0.4s ease 0s; color: black; font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-style: unset;-evernote-highlight:true;\\\" title=\\\"點擊以移除螢光筆畫記\\\">很微小或者很明显的都要说出来。争执中人们很容易把关注的重点放在分歧上，还很容易进入戒备状态，不再倾听对方的意见。</span><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">不过，我们在多项研究中发现，即使双方意见激烈冲突，通常还是会有一些共通的价值观或信念。要强调这部分，让交流的双方感觉距离没有那么远。比如在关于防疫方案的分歧之中，可以说“我知道我们都希望疫情平息……”或者“我知道保持社交距离可能对儿童不好……”。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">在沟通中使用这四项策略，我们就可以令激烈的争执转为更有效率的交流沟通。我们的研究验证了一点：对不同意见的接受性可以通过学习获得。在几项研究中，我们为参与者提供提升接受性的培训，然后观察其他人是否觉得这部分参与者有接受性。具体来说，我们让一些参与者参加使用接受性语言的五分钟培训，然后让他们针对一篇与自己观点不一致的文章写回复，比如一篇文章写的是校园性侵（“大学校园中发生性侵，嫌疑犯应当立即被学校除名，以保护受害者”）。对照组则用自己的风格写回复。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">结果表明，实验组参加过接受性语言培训的参与者，写出的回复更能说服读者转变对重要社会议题的观念，而且读者更愿意找他们进一步交流，认为他们更有判断力。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">研究带给我们的启迪是，</span><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">即使讨论的话题容易引起争议，观点截然相反的人之间也可以进行有建设性的交流。</span><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">利用以上介绍的方法，我们就可以弥合分歧。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">关键词：</span><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">自管理</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div><br/></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">弗朗西丝卡·吉诺（Francesca Gino）|文</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">弗朗西丝卡·吉诺是一名行为科学家，哈佛商学院工商管理学坦登家族教席教授，著有《Rebel Talent: Why It Pays to Break the Rules at Work and in Life》和《Sidetracked: Why Our Decisions Get Derailed, and How We Can Stick to the Plan》。</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">朔间|译  周强|编校</span></div></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">《哈佛商业评论》联系方式</span></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px 0px 1.5em; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">投稿及内容合作 | zhenminma@hbrchina.org</span></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">广告及商务合作 | luojiajin@hbrchina.org</span></div></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\"><img src=\\\"意见不一时，回避是最不明智的选择_files/640 [3]\\\" type=\\\"image/jpeg\\\" data-filename=\\\"640\\\" height=\\\"430\\\" style=\\\"margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;font:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;\\\" width=\\\"430\\\"/></span></div></div></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div><br/></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div><span style=\\\"font-size: inherit; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; border: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;\\\">公众号ID：hbrchinese</span></div></div><div style=\\\"margin: 1.5em 0px 0px; padding: 1.5em 0px 0px; border: 0px; font-size: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; position: relative;\\\"><div style=\\\"font-size: inherit; position: absolute; left: 25%; top: 0px; z-index: 10; width: 50%; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; height: 0.1em; margin: 0px; opacity: 0.25; background: -webkit-linear-gradient(0deg, rgb(243, 242, 238) 1%, rgb(31, 9, 9) 50%, rgb(243, 242, 238) 99%);\\\"></div><div><span style=\\\"font-size: 16px; color: rgb(31, 9, 9); font-family: &quot;PT Serif&quot;; line-height: 1.5em;\\\">长按二维码，订阅属于你的“卓越密码”</span></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div><br/></div></span>\\\n</div></body></html>\\u0000\"]],\"start1\":0,\"start2\":0,\"length1\":0,\"length2\":36246}]"
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updated_time: 2025-11-28T21:04:35.884Z
created_time: 2025-11-28T21:04:35.884Z
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